Tonight the Missus went out with her girlfriends
to get some dinner and see a teenage vampire romance movie. She deserves it,
because she takes excellent care of me and our young-uns, and she very seldom
takes a night off.
One of her friends has a little boy who needed a
babysitter, so we said, "Why not leave him with us? We planned to stay in.
The girls can entertain him, and I'll be around in case any problems
arise." So that's what she did. The boy is about one, maybe two years old.
I'm not sure exactly. I'm not really a baby expert.
Here is the conversation between my oldest
daughter, Josie, and me about 5 minutes after the moms left:
Josie: Oh, maybe he shouldn't play
downstairs where all those jars are stacked.
Me: Yeah, bring him up here...
[Looking around the living room] Just keep him away from the wire cutters and
the soldering iron.
Josie: Right! Our house isn't
exactly "baby-proofed," is it?
Me: Not exactly. He has
some toys in his diaper bag.
They fixed a snack and then turned on the TV to
watch "Gnomeo and Juliet" with him. If I'm not mistaken, it's just
like Shakespeare's tragedy of forbidden love, but with more gnomes.
Please don't call the authorities on us. All
night, only one glass got broken. It was a complete accident, and the kid was
nowhere near it. NOBODY WAS EVER IN REAL DANGER, AND I HAVE FOUR UNBIASED WITNESSES WHO WILL TESTIFY TO THAT FACT.
I am posting this for your enjoyment, knowing the
mother probably does not read my blog. And knowing we're really not interested
in professional child care, so we have no need for references from anyone who
does read it.
Hey, as long as the Missus came back more relaxed than when she left, and the baby was returned in serviceable condition, that's a win.
ReplyDeleteThough I'm curious what you were working on in the living room with a soldering iron. My girl has rules about that kind of thing around here...
By the way, that email was hilarious!
What were we doing with the soldering iron? Science fair experiments, of course! We finished several days ago, but I haven't exactly "put away" my tools yet.
ReplyDelete