Early Morning Booty Call From My Sister-In-Law

My lovely wife has sisters scattered all over the country, and she often talks on the phone with them.

Recently, she got a call from one of them at about 7:00 A.M., when we were just starting to wake up. I didn’t hear what they talked about, but it was a very short conversation.

Later, she told me her sister had somehow called by mistake, and it might have been something she terms a 'butt call.'

I said, “A what?” and got ready for an explanation that’s either very interesting or totally confusing. I was a little scared to hear what she meant by 'butt call.'

She clarified: A butt call is what happens when you put the phone in the back pocket of your jeans and your butt pushes the buttons, unintentionally calling someone.

“Oh, of course,” I said, “...but people already have a name for this. It’s a ‘booty call.’”

She insisted this is not what’s meant by 'booty call,' but I know I’m right; butt and booty are synonymous.

I just can’t figure out why we got so many strange looks at church on Sunday when I asked her if she’s had any more early morning booty calls. People need to mind their own business.

… 

Here’s Munchausen by Proxy, featuring the always delightful Zooey Deschanel, who declares in song, “I’m not your late night booty call.” (Apparently, she has friends who aren't careful with their phones.)