Saturday, January 4, 2014

Some Observations and Questions...

... or, "a few things my brain has been working on.”

- Have you ever noticed that in magazine ads for watches, the time is always about 10:10? (Sometimes they make it 10:08 or 10:09, somewhere in that range.) I guess they're intent on giving a balanced appearance. Seems awfully conventional, though, for a product that's often marketed as an expression of one's individual style. There's no such thing as an average citizen, but we all like things tidy. Even the avant-garde fashionista and the rock climbing, yacht racing polar explorer have a sense of feng shui when selecting a timepiece. "I want a watch that lets the world know I'm the fighter pilot type, living on the edge and, especially, following my own path. But when selecting that watch, I want to see the hands, the date window, and the hour markers as clearly as possible."

- How is it that we can put a man on the moon, but we can't make a soda fountain that will not drip on my hand as I pull my cup away?

- Why is a man on the moon always used as the standard of technological achievement? Why not nuclear fission, laser eye surgery, or mapping the human genome? We can put a man on the moon, but we can't seem to think of another accomplishment to reference when making a proverbial claim about human progress.

- I think they should make a movie about Leonardo da Vinci, and cast Leonardo DiCaprio in the lead role, just because that would look neat rolling up the screen in the closing credits. I wonder if DiCaprio will go bald and grow a beard in his old age.

- People like to shorten up big words, to make them easier to say. And yet, when talking about a ladies' doctor, they always pronounce each letter of the abbreviation: Oh-Bee-Jee-Why-Enn. Folks, that's five syllables! Why not just  pronounce it Ob-Gyne? That's what I'd do, if I ever had a need to talk about such a person. The rest of you can say the whole thing; it won't bother me. Just don't get upset if I end up with more free time than you.


  1. - How will I know that people seeing my watch know that I'm an artiste/bon vivant/chipmunk wrestler if I can't first see that the date window numbers are in exactly the correct font?
    - I just drink right from the nozzle.
    - The moon landing was a hoax promulgated by those seeking to draw attention away from the swayng of Elvis' hips.
    - I'm not sure everyone knows exactly what ob/gyn stands for...

  2. EG! I just noticed your comment here!

    - What should I do now that my watch (pictured above) has a malfunction that makes the date freeze, usually halfway between two numbers, and the day of the week display in French? I am serious, this really happens. I love the watch otherwise.

    - That is an excellent idea. I feel foolish for having wasted so many cups, lids, and straws over the years.

    - You believe this too? I thought I was alone in this suspicion.

    - You're probably right. They know what the letters mean, but not what they stand for. So they pronounce every letter to make themselves appear smarter.

  3. After three years of my watch sitting dead in a drawer, I finally read the manual and got a new battery.

    Sadly, this is a serious answer.

  4. Well, I've often said "If we can put a man on the moon, why not all of them?"; usually in response to something hubby has mumbled about my favorite movies - Steel Magnolias, Fried Green Tomatoes, and Little Women (all versions).

    1. Too-SHAY!

      I think man would never have made it to the moon if he'd wasted his time watching movies about women crying over someone's death. Or, I don't know, sitting around making doilies while watching movies about women who like to make doilies and stuff. I am MAN! I discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn!