If you've been following this blog for long, you know that I'm pretty much a genius about caring for children. I'm also trained in technical writing. So, as a public service for my readers, I've created a simple, universal infant care flowchart. Flowcharts are fun, right?
If you're a new parent, babysitter, uncle, grandma, or neighbor of a wee man-cub, or if you live at a monastery where people occasionally drop off their unwanted offspring in baskets on the front porch, you might find this helpful.
Just start at the top center and follow it down. It covers virtually every possibility and might even arrive at a real solution.
Legal disclaimer: Brian, the staff of Unintimidated by Convention, and Blogger.com accept no liability related to claims made in this article. Brian is not a child care professional, and not all of his methods have been tested on actual human infants. He is not licensed to provide child care advice, and in fact has often made babies cry and toddlers run away in fear. Readers should understand that handling infants often results in stained clothing and pulled hair. It also puts people at risk of coming in contact with saliva, urine, feces, vomit, or a combination of these. Some infants cry purely for the fun of it and can never be made to stop. Readers put their own sanity on the line when choosing to care for such a creature. Do NOT shake your baby.