Thursday, October 6, 2011

I Parked Next to Oscar the Grouch's Car Today

In an earlier post, I showed you how someone saved money by doing his own car body repairs.

Today, I saw a car that someone is using to save on trash collection bills. Like a sucker, I’ve been putting my old drink cups, banana peels, junk mail, and other refuse into the trash can, which gets emptied—for a fee—once a week (provided I remember to drag it to the curb). This guy just throws everything into his Ford Tempo, saving time and money. I presume it accumulates until he can no longer see over the top of it, at which time he only has to open the passenger doors in the Wal-Mart parking lot, letting it all cascade to the ground.

He must be filthy rich.

Rain water and glare make this a crummy shot, so you'll just
have to take my word that the entire car is filled with trash.

It looks like a win-win situation: there’s still plenty of room for him in the driver’s seat, he has a perfect excuse to refuse giving rides to friends (where would they sit?), and he never has to go looking for a wastebasket, dumpster, or recycling bin. As an added bonus, he’ll never have to worry about women trying to go on a date with him… or talk to him… or even stand within 20 feet of him.

To my wife and kids: After seeing this, I apologize for all the times I’ve gotten on your case over a few gum wrappers or a video rental receipt in the minivan, and I promise to lighten up from now on.


  1. That's just wrong. It looks like something out of Hoarders! The smell must be incredible!

  2. I know Wayne! It's like he's TRYING to be as disgusting as possible.

  3. Ok, I have to admit that there's a bit more crap in the rear seat of my Explorer than I would like.
    But in my defense, I focus on driving and not where to put the burger wrapper/empty cigarette pack/empty soda bottle/etc.
    While my passengers have occasionally pointed out the mess
    A - I do try to clean it up when I know I'll be driving people around.
    B - I'm the only driver of it, so I know I'll have a seat anyway.

    Glad mine doesn't get as bad as that Tempo though!

  4. If you throw your stuff into the back seat and clean it out once every full moon, it will never get as bad as this. It's like this guy is making a concentrated effort to surround himself with trash. Like Oscar.

  5. Wow. This really IS the same story. And YOU did it first. And possibly funnier. Damn you, Kwyj!

    More importantly though, how deeply disturbing is the fact that there are multiple individuals out there plagued with this same disgusting affliction?

    Oh, and to those of you who want to see the SECOND example of this story ...

  6. OldDog, I beat you to the scoop, but your pictures are better. And it looks like your hoarder got even more trash piled in the car than this guy did.

    Oh, dear me! Let's not start a competition on this.